Damian “needed someone nearby at all times, especially to watch him shave” because he is 8 different kinds of personality disorder. Flatter him, and you’ll become his favorite.Īudrina hears this whole bit, and then a bunch of whispering as they conspire against her.īUT! The mother-daughter bonding is ruined when Ellspbeth figures out that Vera took her jewelry! And then Vera’s like, fuck it, I’m going to go sell my body in the street! Those townies will pay lots of money for a WHITEFERN DAUGHTER! Peace out. Remember all that’s happened to her has given you a certain edge.
She says she’ll ruin what’s left of the family name by yelling about family secrets in the middle of Main Street.Įllie’s like, god, I should have just had an abortion! Anyway, burning your bridges now would be stupid, since if you play your cards right we’ll profit sooner or later:Īudrina doesn’t have to be the darling in this family, Vera.
She figures that has to be a better gift than the first Audrina’s deal.Īunt E fights with her daughter, who wants to date but isn’t allowed, and because Vera is kind of awesome, she goes straight for the blackmail. She claims to have spent money earned by helping little old ladies with their groceries and such, and lays it on thick about how much she loves him and wants to pretend he’s her real father.ĭrink 2 x because that’s how many times Damian’s thick toenails are referenced.Īudrina plans to win her father’s love by picking stocks for him so he’ll get rich. She messes up one of Damian’s shirts, successfully blames it on Audrina, hocks her mother’s jewelry to buy a new one and tells him she had it fixed at a “silk-mender” which, whatever.
Check out the archive for earlier entries!Īudrina desperately wants to make her father love her more than the 1 st Audrina, but Vera is also doing her best to be daughter number one.
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